Sunday, June 24, 2007

My Recovery...a lesson in patience and faith

Just when I thought I was pretty good at patience and faith in my life, I've had a real test in these areas over the last 3 weeks since my surgery...

Theoretically, I knew that my vision wouldn't be perfect after my surgery, but honestly I was more concerned about actually getting through the procedure without moving (and thus damaging my eyes even more), and hadn't really thought about what it meant to not have perfect vision for a while afterwards (at least a month or so). Of course when I met the doctor for the first time on the day of my surgery, and she discussed PRK with me, I told her that it was fine with me because I'd rather have a better long-term outcome for my eyes, even if it meant a longer recovery period. Of course she knew I was a nurse so she believed me...and at the time I really believed it...theoretically.

The first two weeks were difficult for me because I really couldn't see as well as I could with my glasses prior to surgery. I woke up and everything, especially close up, was blurry, just like it had been prior to surgery or worse. I'd put my glasses on and it was worse. I'd read for 10 minutes, and it would get even worse. Watching TV was awful, but I persevered through that. I went golfing last week and would have to try and follow the ball carefully because if I hit it really hard and really far, I couldn't see where it went (no I didn't use this to cheat). Then on top of all of that, I got sick as well, with a bug that hung out in my lungs for a few days, and was aggravated by my seasonal allergies. Wah, wah, wah...

So what have I learned through all of this? I have learned that I don't have as much patience as I thought I did, at least not when I thought I should see and feel better faster. I've learned that it's harder to be a patient than I thought. And I've learned that while I wanted to be healed quickly, I still had to wait. I have been humbled to learn in my eye appt last Tuesday that I'm actually seeing better than average, and healing faster than average for this type of surgery (in spite of my lack of faith). I have been blessed by the faith and prayers not only that I have offered, but also that have been offered in my behalf. And I finally feel like I'm seeing better this week than I have in the past...and I finally believe that I really will be able to see again someday.

I'm very grateful for my family and friends that have been supportive, in thoughts, words and deeds, through this whole process. THANK YOU!

Here's a poem I've liked for a lot of years:

A Lesson in Adversity
by Lisa South

Traveling by bus,
those around me slumbered,
yet sleep eluded me.

I thought how fortunate
my companions were,
oblivious to the aches and pains.

They missed the tedious hours.
They missed the pouring rain.
I envied them so --
Until they missed the rainbow.

Sunday, June 10, 2007

My Eye Surgery

The surgery went much better than I thought it would -- about 3 minutes per eye, which is quite tolerable on Valium. My sister, Brenda was there to watch and take pictures, and drive me home afterwards. I was calm through the whole thing, and the staff and doctor were all great at talking me through it. There were a series of sensations -- visual and otherwise -- that were quite interesting. Here are a few pictures...

Afterwards, Brenda and I stopped at Costco to pick up my prescriptions. I found myself dizzy and tired, and had funny glasses on my eyes. At one point while I was waiting for Brenda in line, I sat down, and then layed down on one of the big flat-bed shopping carts which was close-by. Of course she was embarrassed when she turned around and saw me. It was all pretty funny.